I was born into a non-Christian household. And as I grew, I lost my trust in religion to the point where I would wonder if there was even a higher power. In my silent cries, I would pray and hope that this higher power would save me, but time and time again, I was let down. And it led me to question if I wanted to live on. I moved to Australia in 2018 in hopes that this big move would help me gain a fresh start. But I was wrong, my past weighed me down and I could not let it go. I had no friends and I did not know who to turn to for help. I was drowning in a sea of anxiety and stress.
During that time, a friend of mine invited me to their life-group. At first, I was reluctant and would only show up once in a blue moon. But something kept pulling me back. I did not know why these people were so passionately believing in Jesus Christ. Slowly, I started to learn and began attending life-group more frequently. I made friends who for the first time in my life, did not want to do me any harm. I found a family who I could lean on for support and I truly felt that I belonged. My life group leader would often ask me: “when will you want to accept Christ”, “what are your thoughts about it”, and I would always burst into tears. I was stuck at a crossroad. I kept questioning myself if it was the right religion and whether I would lose my belief again. This went on for months. I believed in Christ but I could not believe in the miracles he performed. Being someone who loves science, it made no sense to me. It was only after a friend shared that “you won’t believe in everything all at once. It is a journey” that I genuinely started thinking about a life following Christ.
One particular life group evening, I remember everyone asking me why I burst into tears, I could not stop crying and my best friend said that I had already crossed the line and accepted Christ in my heart but I just did not want to believe it yet. After a few days, I finally said the prayer and accepted Christ as my one true God and Saviour. These lyrics: “there’s another in the fire, standing next to me” from the song ‘Another in the fire’ constantly reminds me that I am not alone. Though the journey has not been easy, I find constant strength and support in God’s Love. I have finally been able to let go of my past and forgive.
Deuteronomy 31:6, “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”
Bachelor of Information Technology
UniGen QUT2, Hope Church St Lucia