I would like to share my experience of bitterness. In the past few years, people I met have left bitterness in my heart. Despite my imperfections, I did not look at my own heart, and instead got angry with their doings unto others and to me as well. The bitterness consumed me so much that I was able to judge those people in a harsh way and questioned God of their doings but God was silent. Eventually it consumed me inside out as time went by.
During that time, I had struggles with my faith; it was at its lowest point but I knew I had to keep my faith in Him for some reason. Perhaps God had planted something deep inside my heart – I was unable to let go of God at the end of the rope. By the grace of God, He helped me to examine my own heart. I realised that we can all be like Cain by allowing the sin to master us instead of ruling over it. “If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.” (Genesis 4:7) We are so tangled with envy, jealousy and bitterness and it consumes us so much that we are able to do awful things.
It was an eventful journey that God graciously helped me to overcome the bitterness I had, and now anytime I encounter unpleasant people, I am able to laugh and move on. In days where my circumstances affect my heart, I pluck up the courage to examine my own heart and sought the Lord for help, and He graciously helps me to overcome it. “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.” (James 4:10)
One thing I would like to encourage you all with – you are not alone in any circumstances you face. We are still on our journey with God and transformations will not be immediate, do not be disappointed but keep walking with God. Before you know it, you are changing day by day like a clay pot being perfected by the Potter.
I am still a work in progress, though with God’s help I am certain that the journey ahead will be one filled with His grace, abundance and most importantly His love. “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” (Proverbs 4:23)
IT Support Engineer / Bachelor of Network Systems
Elevate S1, St Lucia Morning Service